duhpursuit

I have a beautiful life.

The garden in the back, tomatoes filling the spaces between basil and okra, the spiders and hummingbirds keeping things in balance. The compost pile in the corner of the yard has two avocado trees growing as hard as they can before the frost, still just a promise from October. There are raspberries now, after two years of tenderness and waiting, another handful every few days.

Waking up at 8 o’clock with motivation and nothing that has to be done. The floors are swept. The counters smoothed and sprayed down. Eggs and coffee sizzling in their pots and pans. Tip-toe-shuffle back to bed to smell your hair and nestle my face into your neck.

The children, skipping through the halls, smiling, saying they can’t wait for sixth-period when they will see me, opening their ruddy palms for a tootsie roll and smiling, smiling, smiling despite all they have been through, despite all they will have to face without a father, without a mother, without their best friend, a dog named Billy or Goldie or something else they will never forget.

The friends who offer unexpected gifts–jokes in my inbox, a slice of zuchini bread, a text message just because, the updates to their blogs–like honey, like mollasses, slow and sweet, holding things together.

Bread, smooth and fragrant, yielding beneath my fists, rising slowly, teaching me, again, about patience, about the way of things–each of us needs time to rise before we can yield. All this possibility, this beautiful, devastating, hope.

Just a quick update to let you know I’ve been back for a week and only just uploaded my photos from our trip to England. Here’s one of my favorites, but you can view the rest here: England